Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Lady

These days I have been so busy. No time to update the blog. Just post a song I love listening to share with music loving people. So many things have happened to me and I will write about them later. By the way, when I listen to the song, I don't know why but I think someone, a real person, is talking to me, telling me these words. I love the words of the song. They are so wonderful.

Kenny Rogers


Lady, I'm your knight in shining armor
And I love you.
You have made me what I am
And I am yours.
My love, there's so many ways I want to say I love you.
Let me hold you in my arms forever more.
You have gone and made me such a fool,
I'm so lost in your love.
And oh, we belong together.
Won't you believe in my song?
Lady, for so many years I thought I'd never find you.
You have come into my life
And made me whole.
Forever let me wake to see you
Each and every morning.
Let me hear you whisper softly
In my ear.
In my eyes I see no one else but you.
There's no other love like our love.
And yes, oh yes, I'll always want you near me.
I've waited for you so long.
Lady, your love's the only love I need
And beside me is where I want you to be.
'Cause, my love, there's something I want you to know,
You're the love of my life,
You're my lady.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

"Quyen"

This morning I took my son to the art club as usual. On the way, I bought him a box of crayons in a bookstore in Dinh Le Street. When I paid at the check-out desk, we found a novel titled Quyen. I was very excited. That was my name. I decided to take it even I did not read the plot to find if it was to my interest or not. 47000 dongs, I could afford it. Paying and smiling.
I spent my nap reading the novel. The main character is Quyen, a woman of the same generation as me. The author explained the meaning of Quyen in Vietnamese the same as me: a kind of flower and kind of bird. In addition, I find some similarities between the main character and me. I think I find myself in her. I will mention the simple similarities and some sentences expressing her/my feelings. What a coincidence! Maybe the author wanted to tell the public about the destiny/fate of Vietnamese women called Quyen.
Quyen in ‘Quyen’ is a woman from Hanoi. She graduated from Hanoi University. Her major was Literature. The story started when she was 24 years old and finished when she was 33 years old in 2005. In her life, some men appear and they have certain influence on her life: Dung – her ex-husband, Hung – her daughter’s father, Kurma – her present husband, a Sri Lankan man, a kind man, who loves her and cares for her and her daughter very very much. Her daughter is 8 years old or so when the story ended. Me? I am a woman from Hanoi. I graduated from Hanoi University. My major was English. I was 34 years old. In my life, I have met 2 men called Dung (they liked me), a man called Hung (he gave me a bunch of flowers and a toy cat on Women’s Day when I was in 12 Grade, I think he liked me too). I also have a kind friend from another country and we have a good relationship, I think so). And I have a son at the age of 10.
The story is as follows.
Quyen and her husband Dung (in Russia as labour exporting workers), cross the border into Germany illegally. Dung comes first. Quyen is caught behind. Then she is raped by a guy called Hung who leads Vietnamese workers to cross the boders. She is kept in a small house in the forest. She lives there with Hung for 8 months. She does not love him but he forces her to make love with him many times. He does that with a basic instinct of an animal. Then she is pregnant. His attitude changes. He cares for her and feels really happy to know that he has a child. When she is 8 months pregnant, he decides to take her to the refugee camp in West Germany in hope that she can have a better care and she can meet her husband, Dung, who she still loves very much. When crossing the border, to distract the police, Hung asks Quyen to go into anothet car driven by his follower, then he drives fast and has an accident. However, he survives the accident. When Quyen finds Dung, he does not accept her because he thinks that she betrays him. Quyen becomes lonely and feels hopeless and isolated in a strange country. She does not want to live and decide to commit suitcide by cutting her wrist. But her life is saved by a Sri Lankan man called Kumar. This man is really really kind to her. It is him who tells and takes her to the room where her husband is living. It is him who hears Hung shouting at her. Then Quyen and Kumar fall in love with each other and live happily. They have got a small restaurant. But Quyen is not Kumar’s offical wife because his family in Sri Lanka has got a vow, that is men in the Sinnatuerrais mustn’t get married to foreigners. One day, Quyen receives a letter from Hung. He says that he is going to die soon (because he has brain tumour) and expresses his desire to be forgiven and to meet his daughter once before he dies. Quyen takes her daughter to Hung’s house in Hungary. Hung dies and his trash is brought back to Vietnam by Quyen and his friends. During that time, Kumar’s mother visits him, a difficult time for him: he has to choose one mum or Quyen. He tells Quyen (before she decides to go to meet Hung) to stay somewhere waiting for him to persuade mum to accept Quyen. Quyen thinks it is not reasonable. They are living in Germany not Sri Lanka. But just before Kumar comes home with mum does she decide to go to visit Hung. So she can solve the problem: meeting Hung for the last time and avoiding a difficult problem for Kumar. Meanwhile, Kurma tries his best to persuade his mum to accept Quyen as his offical wife. Finally, he succeeds. He rushes to look for his wife and he finds her again. He tells her that his mum overcomes the vow.
And here are some sentences I like very much.
On page 227, where the author describes Quyen’s feelings when she lives in Kumar’s house but they sleep in 2 different rooms. Kumar is different from other men she meets before: no sex harassment. For Quyen, sex is not only orgasm, not only for having children. She thinks human beings are different from animal because of that. Two people having sex together without love is just like basic instinct, not different from bulls, buffalos, dogs, horses. People just make love when they have love. For her, sex in love is a beautiful and decent act. The orgasm of lovers will be multiped, making them endlessly happy and binding their bodies and souls............. She gradually likes him and realises that she can not continue living like this: stay in the same house with Kumar and no sex. She wonders if he loves her or not. Then one day, Kumar holds Quyen’s hands. She lets her hands in his hands. She finds out that she has loved him, already. ................. One day when they travel on subway, she gets out but her bag is stuck in the door but the train continues to run. Kumar cuts the bag strap with his all power (maybe his love for her) and they fall doen on the platform. After the dangerous time, they hold each other tight... What is love? Something you can measure and define how big it is? He saves her life despite the fact that he can die – is that great love he gives to her? If other people, like her ex-husband, sacrifice life to save her? .................. But he does not tels her that he loves her. And as an Asian woman, she does not dare to express her feelings first. And finally she tries her best to ask Kumar if he loves her or not. He explains that he really loves her and her daughter. They come into his life so naturally and he gets used to having them in his everyday life. But he has to wait for his mum to come to lift the vow, so that Quyen can become his offical wife..... And they love each other at a moon night. ....... She looks back her past life and thinks about men who have come into her life and say that they love her. Dung loves her a seflfish love. Hung loves her a instinct love. Phi loves her in order to have a family, no soul – match. Now she is different from Quyen of the past, not belong to the type of women who just need a husband.... She needs a man who has got her standards, who comes to her because he loves her with a basic instinct love and has a soul matching her soul. To have a strong love and life, they need the combination of 2 souls. A woman who has a complicated life and soul needs a man with a soul which is knowledgable, experienced and a man who can understand and share with her the problems in life, respect and sympathize with her. A basic instinct love is not enough to support her sensitive soul. .... She realizes that Kumar is the man of her life....
After reading the novel, I found myself crying. Maybe it has some details like my life and it has a good ending, Quyen finds her real half.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Forever tonight

Let the song speak for us
Feel your breath on my shoulder
And i know we couldn't get any closer
I don't wanna act tough, i just wanna fall in love
As we move into the night i get crazy
Thinking how it's gonna be with you baby
I don't wanna play rough i've been loving you enough
Oh, baby

I wanna take forever tonight
Wanna stay in this moment forever
I'm gonna give you all the love that i've got
I wanna take forever tonightFill you up, fill you up with love
When we close the door all i need is in your eyes
I wanna take forever tonight

Touch my lips, i'm on fire
You're the only one i'll ever desire
Turn the lights down low, make the world go slow
When i'm holding you tonight it's so easy
Nothing moves me like you do when you tease me
And to rush would be a crime
I just wanna spend some time with you baby

And when i'm here beside you
I wanna see what drives you out of your mind
I never wanna leave i only wanna be with you
'cause i love how you feel your love is so real
I wanna take forever tonight
Wanna stay in this moment forever
I'm gonna give you all the love that i've got
I wanna take forever tonight
Wanna stay in this moment forever
I'm gonna give you all the love that i've got
'cause i can't live without you

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Untitled

There are some songs which we listen to again and again. The lyrics, the music, the feelings and the voices are so wonderful. Sometimes, when listening to songs, we can find our stories in them. We are so surprised to find out that the musicians seem to write them for us, instead of us.

By Foreigners

So long
I’ve been looking too hard, I’ve waiting too long
Sometimes I don’t know what I will find
I only know it’s a matter of time
When you love someone
When you love someone

It feels so right, so warm and true
I need to know if you feel it too

Maybe I’m wrong
Won’t you tell me if I’m coming on too strong?
This heart of mine has been hurt before
This time I wanna be sure

I’ve been waiting for a girl like you
To come into my life
I’ve been waiting for a girl like you
A love that will survive
I’ve been waiting for someone new
To make me feel alive
Yeah, waiting for a girl like you
To come into my life

You’re so good
When we make love it’s understood
It’s more than a touch or a word we say
Only in dreams could it be this way
When you love someone
Yeah, really love someone

Now, I know it’s right
From the moment I wake up till deep in the night
There’s no where on earth that I’d rather be
Than holding you, tenderly

I’ve been waiting for a girl like you
To come into my life
I’ve been waiting for a girl like you
And a love that will survive
I’ve been waiting for someone new
To make me feel alive
Yeah, waiting for a girl like you
To come into my life

I’ve been waiting, waiting for you, ooh
Ooh, I’ve been waiting
I’ve been waiting, yeah
I’ve been waiting for a girl like you
I’ve been waiting
Won’t you come into my life?
My life?

Friday, April 3, 2009

Coffee alone

I love coffee. Of course, I do. Everyday I drink two cups (But I can drink only coffee with milk). My colleagues say that I am addicted to it - 'coffeeholic'. Mmm, maybe. Most of them just drink green tea or herbal water or bottled water while I drink instant coffee. When I make it in the teachers' room, everyone likes the smell. I think it makes the small room cozier. Coffee makes me more alert and keeps my mind more active. I remember I first drank coffee when I prepared for the entrance exams to university, 17 years ago. I had to stay up late and needed a high level of concentration.


I like the coffee smell, I like the coffee colour, I like the atmostphere in cafes, I like coffee mugs and cups, I like stories around coffee and above all I like being with my friends and enjoying coffee. I read on the Internet that romantic people like to have dates in cafes. I don't know if it true or not. But that piece of information makes coffee 'romantic'. Next time, you come into a cafe, you are regarded as romantic.


Today, I had to go to the clinic to check my health. Because it was still early (around 12.30) I called in Highlands cafe in the Hanoi Tower. This was the first time I was there and the first time I was in a cafe alone. I chose a seat outside. However, I found that I was exposed to the public and it was a bit noisy. I decided to sit inside. A table next to the window was empty. Ideal for me. I could sit in silence and could see the traffic outside. But when people are alone in a peaceful and romantic place, their mind often wanders. You may ask me: 'So what did you think about when being there?' I will answer with a smile: ' I thought about my life.'
By the way, I find 2 Vietnamese songs related to coffee. If you like, ...and more ...

Thursday, April 2, 2009

A free afternoon

An afternoon no working. So I had lunch with my colleagues in the canteen and went home. No hurry. It was not a nice day today: raining, cold and of course gray. This kind of weather makes people like me feel bored and sad easily. (Actually, I was sad and a bit bored.) Luckily, it is going to end soon. I tried to have a nap at 1.45 but failed. Some friends of my father-in-law's came and made a noise. It was 3 o'clock. Time to get out of the bed. I turned on the computer and listened to music. I can't stop that habit: listening to music while at the desk. Drinking coffee, checking email and reading blogs. One of my friends who thinks that I have a good knowledge of grammar asks me to read and make suggestions. No problem. It is also a good exercise for me: checking my own knowledge and learning something new about somebody else's life.
Now I am listening a song by Roxette. A nice song. It is from the music file my friend gave to me.

Spending my time

What's the time?
Seems it's already morning.
I see the sky, it's so beautiful and blue.
The tv's on but the only thing showing
Is a picture of you.

Oh I get up and make myself some coffee.
I try to read a bit but the story's too thin.
I thank the lord above
You're not here to see me in this shape I'm in.

Spending my time,
Watching the days go by.
Feeling so small,
I stare at the wall,
Hoping that you think of me too.
I'm spending my time.

I try to call but I don't know what to tell you.
I leave a kiss on your answering machine.
Oh help me please,
Is there someone who can make me
Wake up from this dream?

Spending my time,
Watching the days go by.
Feeling so small,
I stare at the wall,
Hoping that you are missing me too.
I'm spending my time,
Watching the sun go down.
I fall asleep to the sound
Of tears of a clown,
A prayer gone blind.
I'm spending my time

My friends keep telling me:
Hey, life will go on,
Time will make sure
I'll get over you.
This silly game of love
-You play, you win only to lose.

I'm spending my time,
Watching the days go by.
Feeling so small,
I stare at the wall,
Hoping that you think of me too.
I'm spending my time.

I'm spending my time,
Watching the sun go down.
I fall asleep to the sound
Of tears of a clown,
A prayer gone blind.
Im spending my time.